Wit

  • Wit lies in recognising the resemblance among the things which differ and the difference between things which are alike.


    Difference, Wit

  • Wit has truth in it. Wise-cracking is simply calisthenics with words.


    Wit

  • I wonder how many chameleons snuck into the Ark.


    Wit

  • Words may show a man's wit but actions his meaning.


    Wit

  • Time flies like an arrow, but fruit flies like a banana.


    Wit

  • A man might sit down and as systematically and successfully to the study of wit as he might be to the study of mathematics. By giving up only six hours a day to being witty, he should come on prodigiously before mid-summer.


    Wit

  • There’s no possibility of being witty without a little ill-nature. The malice of a good thing is the barb that makes it stick.


    Wit

  • You beat your pate and fancy wit will come.
    Knock as you please, there’s nobody at home.


    Wit

  • An epigram - a wisecrack that played Carnegie Hall.


    Wit

  • The witty riposte one thinks of only when one has left the drawing room and is already on the way downstairs – staircase wit.


    Wit

  • His wit invites you by his looks to come
    But when you knock it never is at home.


    Wit

  • A wit should be no more sincere than a woman constant; one argues a decay of parts, as t’other of beauty.


    Wit

  • You can pretend to be serious, but you can’t pretend to be witty.


    Wit

  • For when the wine is in, the wit is out.


    Wit

  • One cannot be always laughing at a man without now and then stumbling on something witty.


    Wit

  • He can brighten a room just by leaving it.
    [on Gordon Brown]


    Wit

  • I remember my brother once saying “I’d like to marry Elizabeth Taylor,” and my father saying “Don’t worry, your time will come.”


    Wit

  • I fear nothing so much as a man who is witty all day long.


    Wit

  • Mr Speaker, I withdraw my statement that half the cabinet are asses – half the cabinet are not asses.


    Wit

  • You can pretend to be serious; you can’t pretend to be witty.


    Wit

  • Wit is a sword; it is meant to make people feel the point as well as you see it.


    Wit