Names

  • We do have these extraordinary names. When you see the sign ‘African Primates Meeting‘ you expect someone to produce bananas.


    Names

  • Because he spills his seed on the ground.
    [on being asked why she named her Canary ‘Onan ‘]


    Names

  • No, I’m breaking it in for a friend.
    [on being asked if it was his real name]


    Names

  • Yossarian, the very sight of the name made him shudder. There were so many esses in it. It had to be subversive.


    Names

  • Every Tom, Dick and Harry is called Arthur.


    Names

  • Colin is the sort of name you give to your goldfish for a joke.


    Names

  • Apart from my own name, the Transpennine Express is the greatest misnomer of all time.


    Names

  • There is no English surname, however ancient and dignified, that cannot instantly be improved by the prefix ‘Spanker’.


    Names

  • I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered. But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalogue: - `No good in a bed, but fine against a wall.’


    Names