Quotes by Stephen Leacock

  • Being a specialist is one thing; getting a job is another.


    Work

  • Most people tire of a lecture in ten minutes; clever people can do it in five. Sensible people never go to lectures at all.


    University

  • There are two things in conversation which ordinary people dislike – information and wit.


    Conversation, Talk

  • It was Einstein that made the real trouble. He announced in 1905 that there was no such thing as absolute rest. After that there never was.


    Science

  • When Rutherford was done with the atom all the solidity as pretty well knocked out of it.


    Science

  • Many a man in love with a dimple makes the mistake of marrying the whole girl.


    Love

  • The Irish he says don’t care for clean government; they want Irish government.


    Irish

  • I detest life insurance agents. They always argue that I shall someday die, which is not so.


    Insurance

  • It is to be observed that `angling’ is the name given to fishing by people who can’t fish.


    Fishing

  • The science of arresting human intelligence long enough to get money from it.


    Advertising

  • Advertising may be described as the science of arresting the human intelligence long enough to get money from it.


    Advertising

  • I find it hard to accept, difficult to swallow, the new term ’ecology’ which has come to us. It sounds a little too much like being sick.


    Ecology